 Select a news topic from the list below, then select a news article to read.
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Jun
25
2006
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Sunday, 25 June 2006 |
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I have been in a Netflix hole. That's when you put movies on your
list that you don't really want to watch, and then they sit at home.
You feel too guilty to send them back, and they just sit there. When
it's one, no problem, you watch the other two. Then it becomes two, and
you exchange only the third movie. Finally, the third dud arrives, and
you are in a Netflix hole.
It's been three months, now, and I decided to cancel my
subscription. I go to the site, hit "My Account", move on to the Cancel
link, and there it is: the dreaded phone number.
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Read more...
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Jun
22
2006
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Thursday, 22 June 2006 |
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Yesterday, I woke up with one of those stupid 1-day colds I get once
in a while. I felt horrible, and by noon I needed meds. I pack up and
drive to the Safeway. I remember to go to the Starbucks nearby, and
just as I get out of the place, something scratches my head very
briefly. Everybody around me is snickering.
I look around, see nobody. I look puzzled to the cute girl sitting
at a table, doing her assignments. She smiles, points to somewhere in
the air and says there is a bird defending a nest.
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Jun
05
2006
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Monday, 05 June 2006 |
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I always wanted to learn how to juggle. Daniel, a friend of mine, is really good at it, and it's one of those skills that stay with you and that give you something to do when you are bored (not that that ever happens).
I once went to Cirque du Soleil, and they sold juggling balls in three packs. I bought a set, leather balls filles with lightweight material. I juggled them for a while when in Hawaii, but never got good with them. I can juggle six throws easily, but eight is still elusive.
One day, I got home to find a hole in the tent and in the juggling balls. I immediately thought my contractor had done it and just didn't want to fess us (he's known for that). But then it turns out later that the balls are filled with buckwheat, and a mouse took care of eating it.
So now I had to build my own juggling balls... Here's how I did it.
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Jun
04
2006
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Sunday, 04 June 2006 |
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Have you ever seen a cane spider? They are humongous spiders (well, maybe four inches wide) that live in the grass, actively hunt for food, carry their litter of eggs in a sack on their belly, and otherwise bother me when I have to pee in the grass or, as of lately, in the car.
Someone mentioned there was a cane spider in the car. I paid no attention, having seen none. Tonight, as I was leaving the Home Depot, I noticed something yellowish on the driver's seat side, but before I could do anything about it, it was gone, crawled up in the console.
Great! Now I could drive home knowing a humongous spider was hiding in the console! Thank goodness I did know that there was nothing to be feared, since they are ugly critters, but not dangerous ones. I survived, so did the spider, and another one of these days we will have another encounter.
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May
24
2006
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Wednesday, 24 May 2006 |
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Stolen from one of them funny sites...
DOGS DIARY...
7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favourite!
8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favourite!
9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favourite!
Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favourite!
2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favourite!
3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favourite!
4 pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favourite!
6 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Mum! My favourite!
7 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Dad! My favourite!
8 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favourite!
9 pm - Oh boy! Tummy rubs on the couch! My favourite!
11pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in my people's bed! My favourite!
CAT'S DIARY...
Day 483 of my captivity...
My captors continued to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.
The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction that I get from clawing their furniture.
Tomorrow I will eat another houseplant.
Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while
they were walking almost succeeded - must try this at the top of
the stairs.
In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once
again induced myself to vomit on their favourite chair. I must remember
to try this on their bed.
Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to
make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear in
their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little
cat I was. Hmmm, that did not work according to plan...
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in
solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and
smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was
due to my powers of inducing "allergies." I must learn what this is and
how I may use it to my advantage.
I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches;
* The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit.
* The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant and speaks
with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his
current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured.
But I have patience, I can wait, it is only a matter of time......
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